One of the most fundamental challenges every human being faces is the creation of their own identity. The world and the people around you constantly throw identity-pieces at you, but you're the only one who can decide which pieces to include, how much of them and how to puzzle them all together so there aren't too many obvious contradictions. It's really difficult, because there is no optimal solution and it requires a lot of compromises. That's why it is tempting to just take a huge puzzle piece that works well for other people and build your whole identity around that. After all, if you share a large part of your identity with these other people, it's easy to become friends with them and you get a social circle for free, as a bonus.
Now, there's nothing wrong with this approach. It has been used by many, if not the majority, of humans. It comes in many forms, such as religions, political ideologies, philosophical ideas or even artistic visions. And the place you get in a social group isn't even the only benefit. It allows you to focus all your energy into one thing, making you very efficient in achieving your goals. Additionally, people who have a clear vision are more attractive to other people, as they are much easier to understand.
But putting all your eggs in one basked also comes with certain risks. No matter how central you make that one thing you build your identity on, there's always the possibility that you could dissociate with it. It may come as the result of an unexpected event (admittedly, climate change being solved is an extremely unlikely example), the actions of your social group or simply the accumulation of too many contradictions that arise in your daily life. But in any case, if the one thing you built you identity on becomes unfeasible for you, your whole identity could collapse. What follows is a brutal identity crisis.
But maybe the prospect of an identity crisis doesn't concern you too much. And maybe it shouldn't. After all, what is life without taking a few risks. Still, I have the feeling that it might not be the best approach, as many people seem to have a terrifyingly fragile personality. They seem to be afraid to be confronted with opposing views, try to avoid contact with people outside their social group and either advocate for society to establish "safe spaces" to protect them from "psychological violence" or hide behind physical strength through weapons or muscles.
On the other hand, I tried to do it differently. I tried to build a custom identity from lots of small pieces, to create something that is uniquely mine. It didn't work very well. I constantly stumbled over contradictions, made some really stupid impressions on people and had quite a few small identity crises. Then I discovered nihilism. I realized that the best centerpiece I could build into my identity might be nothing. And the result is incredibly stable. I'm not afraid of being confronted with opposing views. I even enjoy the occasional heated arguments.
But no matter how satisfied I am with the stability of my personality, there's still a big problem with it. I know very little people who share it. There's no social circle associated with it. So although I'm blessed with some really awesome friends, I can't help but feel lonely at times. That's the main reason this blog post's conclusion isn't: be like me! Maybe I'm on the completely wrong path. So the only conclusion I can give you, as unsatisfying as it may be, is to find your own way.
