... why it is legal for Penguin Corp. to kick people in the stomach:

The short answer is, that they have really good lobbyists. They convinced some politicians to make new regulations that allowed them to classify non-customers automatically in the highest risk class, due to their hazard level not being known to the company. They then convinced some other politicians, that were chosen to be not good friends with the first set of politicians, to loosen regulations, so that individuals in the highest risk class could be attacked in self defence without warning.

Fun fact: Penguin Corp. is a publicly traded company and thus required by law to choose their actions in the interest of their investors, meaning they need to maximize profits. Since multiple studies, *very surprisingly*, have shown that inflicting physical pain on people who are not your customers increases your customer base, Penguin Corp. is now legally required to kick people in the stomach.

Capitalism is fun!

Panel 1:
P's doorbell rings
Panel 2:
A duck is at the door, immediately kicking P in the stomach.
Panel 3:
P: What the hell? That really hurt! What did you do that for?
D: Dunno. That kick was ordered by Penguin Corp. Please sign here that you received it.
Panel 4:
P is now on the phone
Phone: Welcome to Penguin Corp. customer service. How can I help you today?
P: I was kicked in the stomach!
Panel 5:
Phone: Can I get your customer ID please?
P: My what? I’m not a customer.
Phone: Ah, I see, there’s your problem.
Panel 6:
Phone: It is company policy to kick all non-customers in the stomach.
P: You ... what? Is that legal?
Phone: Yes.
Panel 7:
P: I ... don’t understand. Well, I mean, I do understand, in a sense, but I don’t ... understand ...
Panel 8:
Phone: The right understanding of any matter and a misunderstanding of the same matter do not wholly exclude each other.
Franz Kafka, The Trial (1920)