Please don't. Arson is a serious crime. I don't think I have to tell you that. Especially since it would be extremely dumb to burn down your own apartment. Instead, do one of the following (all are at least slightly better than burning down your own apartment):
- Pretend you are not home and hope they don't have a key
- If they have a key, replace the lock
- Throw a party when they visit. Nobody expects your apartment to be lean *during* a party.
- Act completely surprised you apartment looks messy and tell them you had a guest that stayed the last few weeks.
- Put cardboard into all windows and remove all lightbulbs. Tell your landlord you like it that way and make sure they don't trip.
- Set an animal free inside your apartment and blame it all on the animal. If it is cute enough, nobody will ask questions.
- Clean up. duh.