Remember: Don't let statistics turn you into a psychopath!

Hurting people, even if in extremely funny ways, is still bad. I know that prolonged exposure to statistics can cause aggression and the desire to cause damage to objects, other people or yourself, but overcoming this is one of the main skills required to become a statistician. I mean, sure, I'm not a statistician but I can imagine that the formulas would all suddenly begin to make sense if I could just suppress this overwhelming desire to pick up the nearest chair and smash it into my former statistics professor's face.

Comic transcript

Panel 1:
G is pouring oil down a staircase, as H walks by.
H: Here you are! I thought we wanted to do the statistics exercise together now ... ahhh... why are you pouring oil down the stairs? Isn’t that dangerous?
G: dat’s de boint!
Panel 2:
G: For exercise 4, I’m conducting a study on the safety of this staircase. However, my effect size was too small, so instead of increasing the sample size, I thought, why not just increase the effect size directly!
Panel 3:
A voice from down the stairs shouts:
Aaaaaah, my leg! It hurts! I will find out whoever did this and I swear to make sure they’ll fail my statistics class!